Saturday, January 26, 2013

Scary!

I did not grow up in a home that offered many opportunities to do daring things. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but it has very much colored what I think of as exciting. And it also put me in the odd position of feeling that I was a boring person when really I'm not. It's fun to think that I spent most of my childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood reading books, and now that I have reached the age that I have, it is time to have more firsthand experience.

Today was one of the most terrifying days of my life. I think it was even scarier than the day I fell in a lake with alligators.

I went to a shooting range.

One of my awesome friends, whose personality is decidedly yellow, if you're into the color code thing, mentioned on Monday that she was taking a firearms safety course. When I seemed intrigued, she offered to let me come along. I might be very cautious about it, but when it comes to something new and foreign, I'm usually game. So I took her up on it.

We spent the afternoon handling a variety of empty guns (the ammo, as required by law, had to be stored in a separate part of the house during the class) and learning about gun safety. Then we had a short break and headed out to the shooting range, where we practiced with real guns with real bullets, then took the firing test.

The first time I pulled the trigger of a loaded 9 mm glock, I almost had a nervous breakdown. I was so shaken I nearly gave up then and there. They coaxed me into firing what was left in the magazine, and then I stepped back, determined to be an observer from that point forward.

Fortunately, the instructors were kind. They gave me a breather, got me some headphones to enhance my earplugs, and let me trade out the 9 mm for a Browning 22. After loading up and shooting that baby, I was feeling pretty ok.

So, to pass the test, you have to shoot 40 times and hit the target at least 28 times. I hit 37 times. Oh, yeah.

I called to tell my daddy all about it, and because we're all about logic and reality vs. validation, he pointed out that at a range of 7, 5, and 3 yards, you don't have to be all that good. And with a 22, you're really not going to do much damage anyway. But it's a lot harder to handle a gun than it looks.

And I passed the test.

Oddly enough, during our dinner break, my awesome yellow friend was talking about some of the situations she encounters at work as a therapist. Our other friend and I were asking lots of questions, and she told us to draw a picture of a person in a rainstorm and she would psychoanalyze us.

It wasn't as terrifying as shooting a pistol, but I was a bit scared of being psychoanalyzed as well. It turned out fine.

And now, there is gunpowder in my nose.

Friday, January 18, 2013

This Is Probably Just a Phase

Until about 2 weeks ago, when I got lonely, I watched foreign films or BBC literature adaptations, or the very occasional modern romantic comedy. And if I didn't want to watch a movie, I read princess books or hung out with friends who love L.M. Montgomery and Jane Austen.

My sister fundamentally changed my life when she suggested that instead of a film with Justine Waddell or Colin Firth, I should go for something with Bruce Willis. She loaned me her edited copy of Die Hard. My favorite part?

"Ho Ho Ho. Now I have a machine gun."

And then, I just saw the trailer for Red 2, and I don't even know who this person is who is so excited. Where did I go?

Friday, January 4, 2013

Books of 2012, the Annual List

I won't do extensive reviews like I want, because a lot of these were already reviewed on my Sis's blog. I pretty much spent this year reading everything she told me was good last year and added some books from my new book club for a bit of variety. So this has been the year of Connie Willis, Megan Whalen Turner, and Sherwood Smith. Here's the annual list, with some commentary, and ratings on a 10-point scale:

1. To Say Nothing of the Dog, Connie Willis. If one says nothing of the dog, one can say a lot about this comedy of errors based on the adventures of a time-lagged historian whose attempts to escape his unreasonable and domineering sponsoress's insane demands lead him back to the Victorian era in search of a blunder, in the form of a disrupted love story, an appallingly ugly family heirloom, and a lost cat, that so disordered the space-time continuum that everyone's life in the future is threatened. It's immeasurably funnier if you have read Shakespeare and the major Victorians. There is little I love in a book more than literary humor, and I was laughing out loud for most of the book. 8

2. The Alloy of Law, Brandon Sanderson. A story set in the same universe as his famous Mistborn series (which I read last year), this one is a fun pastiche of science fiction and the Wild, Wild West. And the character dynamics don't stoop to cliché. 7

3. Shadows in Flight, Orson Scott Card. At long last I got to read what happens to Bean. I love Bean. But this book was just okay. No love, no hate. The somber ending didn't overwhelm me like that of the last book he was in—it fell a bit flat. Normally if I don't love a book I can think up a better ending for myself. This one I couldn't, because maybe there wasn't a better way to end it, and maybe it didn't need to be ended. I dunno. 4

4. Coronets and Steel, Sherwood Smith. We are long-time fans of Sherwood Smith. This new series was the perfect way to engage my mind in a fun action-adventure story right after I moved across the country. What is not to love about a fencing, ballet-dancing history graduate student from California who finds herself in a mysterious family feud in Eastern Europe while on a crazy quest to figure out her grandmother's past? 6

5. Blood Spirits, Sherwood Smith. Spoiler Alert. I can't say I loved the sequel as much as the original. It went the vampire direction. Justify that if you will, but vampires are so cliché I was a bit disgusted when the story took that turn about 2/3 through the book. 5

6. His Majesty's Dragon, Naomi Novik. You know, I love Bromances, and this is really the ultimate in Bromance, except the Bros are a man and a dragon. I wasn't prepared for how endearing the dragons would be, because most dragon stories don't have likeable dragons. There are lots more books in this series. We'll see if I get around to them.6

7. Between Shades of Grey, Ruta Sepetys. This book was practically a Holocaust book, even though it started out in Lithuania and I think it was the Russians rather than the Germans committing the atrocities. I feel like American pop culture's obsession with that time is disrespectful in a way I can't describe adequately. The book was good, but to say a book like this (based on true events and the suffering of real people) is good seems very callous. However, the fact that these people might have wanted their story told and it didn't get crowded out by more popular concentration camp tales is fine with me. They were thrown onto trains and carted out to remote areas of the Russian territory, where they were forced to work on communal farms for almost no food, and ended up being shipped to the North Pole and left on their own. By the time they were rescued, they were almost all dead. It was really a downer, and I can't give it a rating.

8. Imagine: How Creativity Works, Jonah Lehrer. This is one of those pop psychology books that I saw advertised on Amazon. It was the first book I bought to read on my Kindle Touch. A fun read, and very quotable. I might read it again in a few years.6

9. The Queen of Attolia, Megan Whalen Turner. This sequel to The Thief took me completely by surprise. I didn't realize this kind of fantasy got so good! The first book had some tense moments and some brutality, but who expects a love story to open the way this one did? It's a good thing I got the Kindle version, because apparently the paperback cover gives it away, and I think a lot of the impact comes from that one thing being unexpected. 8

10. The King of Attolia, Megan Whalen Turner. Again, I expected these books to be shallow, but they are not. A very fun read about a foreign king winning the respect and allegiance of his people. I don't remember details much, and I will definitely be reading it again soon. 8

11. Conspiracy of Kings, Megan Whalen Turner. Still good. Not quite as strong as the others. We'll see what happens with the fifth book. I expect great things. I have turned my nose up at series books in the past, but occasionally it's ok to break with principle and read them when they're good. 6

12. Ida B., Katherine Hannigan. An okay middle-grade book about a little girl struggling with family and socialization issues. Maybe I'm too hard on it because I've read so many Newbery books, and it seems like middle-grade publishers all want to put out the same story these days. 3

13. I Am Legend, Richard Matheson. I reviewed this on my blog when I read it. I think it's the only Horror genre book I've read, aside from The Prestige. 6

14. A Posse of Princesses, Sherwood Smith. She knows how to do girl power the right way. It was fun, not only because of the lead girl, but because of the ensemble of supporting characters. 5

15. Wild Swans, Jung Chang. I can't remember if I reviewed this book. It's difficult to describe. It is a three-generational memoir beginning with a warlord's concubine, transitioning into the occupation by the Japanese, to the takeover by the Communists, with a detailed account of how it all worked by one who saw it all and left in early adulthood. Of everything I've read this year, Wild Swans probably had the heaviest impact on my intellectual development. Can't give a rating to a real person's life experiences.

16. Room, Emma Donaghue. Hated it. It could have been a Lifetime movie. Someone told me she liked it because it made her think, and that's fine. I like and respect her, but I don't like being made to think about things so sordid—unless maybe they really happened and it would lead to something useful. In this case, it was just a terrible downer with no merit and no utility. 0.5

17. The Virginian, Owen Wister. Already reviewed it. It's good because it was a first. And because the titular character is so endearing. 5

18. Watercrossing, Krissi Dallas. This is the third in an eight-part series my friend and former coworker is publishing. I was one of her early readers and went to publishing conferences with her during its development, so I am very invested in where the story goes. My friend is extremely charismatic and so talented at coming up with things that grab teenagers and the young at heart. I have fun reading them and love and respect what she is doing with her writing (as in, this is probably the only teen magical realism romance out there that doesn't have any sex or bad language). Also, she is another one of the rare women who truly understands how to do girl power the right way, and I am really looking forward to reading the rest of the series. 6

19. Blackout, Connie Willis. Read it. You will love it. Enough said. 8.5

20. All Clear, Connie Willis. Copy #19. This is not a sequel to Blackout, it is part two of a two-volume book. 8.5

21. Palace of Stone, Shannon Hale. Sometimes one reads too many princess books. I really love Shannon Hale as a writer, but the works that get the attention aren't the good ones. This was a sequel to her Newbery award-winning Princess Academy, which was good as princess books go, but there was no need for a sequel. If you want good Shannon Hale, read The Goose Girl. 3

22. These Is My Words, Nancy Turner. A pioneer story about a spitfire girl who crosses dangerous territory with her family to move to Texas, sustaining heavy losses and going back to Arizona. I liked it, I guess, but her voice was too progressive, and it seemed like somebody died on every other page. 5

23. Bellwether, Connie Willis. This might be my favorite of Connie Willis, not because I think it is the best, but because it is the easiest to read. It's trauma free, and every sentence is witty. I especially love the definitions at the beginning of each section. And, well, everyone knows I like to make fun of trendy people, and that was the whole point of this book. 8

24. Passage, Connie Willis. So beautiful. So traumatic. Wow. 8

25. All About Emily, Connie Willis. I've been told that this one would have been a million times funnier if I had seen All About Eve. But I hadn't, and I still managed to laugh hysterically. 8

26. Crossing to Safety, Wallace Stegner. Book club. I liked it. It was an interesting character study about two married couples and the dynamics of marriages and friendships. 7

27. Slaughterhouse Five, Kurt Vonnegut. Already reviewed. 3

28. Madame Bovary, Gustave Flaubert. Finally got around to this one. Well, we all know how it ends, more or less, but it was getting there that was so darkly intriguing. It's difficult to love a book about a woman so caught up in story-book romance that she sabotages her own happiness by feeding a loathing for her husband, her child, and everything else in the world that is mundane and uninteresting. There is a reason this one is a classic. 6

29. Pope Joan, Donna Woodfolk Cross. Already reviewed. 6

30. Beau Geste, Percival Christopher Wren. I liked it pretty well. It was good fun; it reminds me a little of The Four Feathers. Those young British hotheads who wanted to be larger than life could only succeed in adventure fiction that is now practically out of print, probably because it was written by a dude who lived in a very racist time and reflected the attitudes of the day. I watched the movie with my mom—she is a Gary Cooper fan. I might have enjoyed it much more if the chaps playing 20-year-olds hadn't been in their late forties. 5

31. Fire and Hemlock, Diana Wynne Jones. A crazy fantasy built around my favorite T.S. Eliot poem, based on Tam Lin, about entrapment and betrayal and all kinds of weird stuff. The ending picked me up by the feet, swung me around in circles, and flung me to the other side of the room. I'm still trying to figure out what happened, and that's the beauty of it. 8

And I am convinced there should be a 32 on this list, but I forgot to add it to my spreadsheet, so that's another book I read that I will never remember. Sad.